There are two kinds of gardeners: those who grow ornamentals and those who grow edibles.
Of course, many gardeners do both, tilting one way or the other.
I definitely favor ornamentals, but my garden includes four dwarf apple trees, a dwarf lemon tree, a rampant fig tree, a weeping mulberry, an elderberry (that I intend to remove), two small Chilean Guavas (Myrtus ugni), a California Grape (Vitis ‘Roger’s Red’, which needs pruning urgently), and a current (Ribes sanguineum ‘Barrie Coate’). I could be overlooking other edibles.
The wonderful universe of gardeners also could be dichotomized in many other ways: specialist/generalist; avid/indifferent; green thumb/brown thumb; creative/unimaginative; propagator/plant buyer; installer/designer; scheduler/procrastinator.
I will not ask, “Which one are you?” because in all likelihood the typical home gardener shows most or all of those traits at one time or another.
In fact, someone who claims to adhere to just one approach to gardening would lack credibility. We like to focus on our successes with plants and forget the failures, but a honest gardener will admit to having killed his or her share of plants, often by either over- or under-watering. One who delights in dirty hands will be found visualizing an attractive new flowerbed or landscape vignette. And one who declares affection for all plants might be unmasked as a rose aficionado, or another sort of specialist.
The plant world offers enormous ranges of opportunities and challenges, and can easily overwhelm and frustrate the gardener who attempts to embrace it all. Valuable advice is implicit in the existence of plant societies, many of which offer members the comfort of focusing on a single genus. Examples include the American Iris Society, the American Rose Society, the American Dahlia Society, etc.
For a complete list, visit the website of the American Horticultural Association.
Most national societies’ websites will include links to local chapters, so it should be possible to find a nearby group of gardeners with shared interests.
Some organizations are interested in a fairly large category of plants, e.g., the California Native Plant Society, the Pacific Bulb Society, the California Rare Fruit Growers, the Cactus and Succulent Society of America.
Then, there are a few umbrella groups: the National Garden Clubs, Inc.; The Garden Club of America; and The Gardeners of America/Men’s Garden Clubs of America.
Some groups include edible gardening among their interests, but interestingly there is no sign of an American Tomato Society or a Lettuce Growers of America oriented to home gardeners.
Whatever most appeals to you in gardening, you probably could find a group that shares your interest. There might not be a nearby chapter, but the organization might at least have a useful website. Check it out!